Emotional Math

energy doesnt lie.  it has a signature, a feel similar to a colour.  some energies are harmonious, some are not.  some are neutral.

energy can be faked, but not effectively if you are attuned to your body.  bodies can’t lie unless they are being sedated in some way.   once you achieve an equilibrium your fears become fewer than your hopes and dreams, and you stop derailling yoru own rogress.

i use this to guage situations.

peoples body language gives cues to personality, temperment and mood.  i don’t fuck with trouble, and i  never have.  if i feel something off i  go in the other direction.  this used to be a blunt thing.  it kept most people away from me.  i was neither bullied much, nor brought into very close confidence with others.  this identification with being other allowed me subconsiously to begin to get good at noticing my environment.

I’ve had a horrible time all my life trying to hide my discomfort, and because my body did not acknowledge my needs, and i grew up in the 70’s and 80’s and they didn’t know fuck all about how to train teachers or teach kids very effectively.  what was worse was the emotional fallout of the moods of the teachers, and the power dynamics that occured in these environmen ts.  people in jobs they hate, teaching kids that don’t want to be there.  It was a recipe for learning to shut up and get through things as quickly as possible.

spotting when an emotional situation is about to crest into something unpleasant or wonderful is a skill tht most people don’t have, and if they did, they wouldn’t know how to react anyway.

Emotions are the drivers in every single outburst I have ever had or witnessed.  feelings literally motivate us to move into ideas, wheather they are good or bad.

Learning emotional math helped me use these cues to make my decisions about what to say and how to respond.  i lacked basic understanding aqbout how to recognize that p;eople didnt like me, but i was great at noticing everythig in their environments. eventually i could figure out why they didnt like me, decide if i liked me, and proceed from there.


wear headphones if you want to write.  it helps you focus strangely enoughj.

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